Curve Balls

 

SUNDAY, JUNE 16, 2013

Curve Balls

Man, life throws many curve balls, I was not expecting one that came flying at me last week.  I was Fired from my volunteer work.  Not the accomplishment I had expected, and it was devastating for me. I loved that job; I loved the people I worked with, and I especially loved all the patients who touched my life. I violated HIPAA law and took pictures of patients. First off, I just want to say they all had my permission to take their picture, and 2nd I would never post something about a patient without their consent. However, I recently had my blog redesigned, and all the journal entries I had written and drafted, were posted public without me knowing.

  They were written a year or year and a half ago, when I was asked not to mention the facility that I was volunteering for or the patients, I immediately drafted all of them for my children to have, and for myself to look back and remember. For those of you who do not know about drafting, it is a journal you write and never post for all to see but is kept secret and I eventually wanted my blog to be made into a book for my children, so I did as I was asked, and I took all the posts off my blog immediately.  To be honest, I have a ton of drafts, things I don't want the world to see but have saved for my family to read long after I'm dead and gone.

When I went to my "volunteer" job 2 weeks ago, I was called into a meeting where I was "let go" I was told if an employee had done this, they would be "let go," so they felt it was time for me to be "let go" I asked them if I could delete the entries. The answer was "you have 3 days to get them off your blog, or we will be forced to file a federal suit"  so sad, I took off my scrubs and handed in my badge out the door I went feeling like I had just been defeated by the world, I cried uncontrollably for hours, well actually the crying went on for days, I finally got it controlled to a slow tearful drip after a few days.  When I got home, I asked our attorney if this could happen to me; he said NO, that the facility I was volunteering for could not sue me for violating HIPAA laws the patient would have to be the one to sue me, --and since every one of those patients or their caregivers still email me regularly, (except for one), I contacted each person who I had ever posted about, got written permission from them or in a couple cases the patients had passed on, and I got permission from their caregivers, who by the way also asked me for a copy of what I had written, by this time I had already deleted them.  However, I told them once I had their written permission, I would send them a copy of what I had handwritten.  Each was so grateful, I had journaled, and each had already known about the experiences and the intimate talks I had with them, so it was not a surprise to any of them when I read the journaling to them.

 I'm not sure what this world is coming to, I do understand the HIPAA laws, and I do understand the right to have privacy, but I would never post something without first asking the patient. There was only one post that I had written that I felt was imposing without permission; names were never mentioned, and if this person had found it on the world wide web (1 in a billion) They could have guessed it was them I was talking about, but there were no pictures or proof.

I learned a lot from this experience, and although I think "they" were being a bit dramatic in their decision, I know the Lord has something else planned for me.  It's important for me to be in a place where I am not only needed but appreciated for the service I love to give.

Relay For Life - 2011

MONDAY, MAY 2, 2011

Relay for Life-2011

We continued our tradition this year as a family and participated in the American Cancer Society's Relay for Life in Gilbert.  Last year I was still in treatment and not feeling too well when I went, but remember being so grateful that I did.  This year the feelings of gratefulness were the same, however, my health is so much better and I was able to really enjoy it.  I have the greatest family ever, they celebrated with TEAM MONYA and supported me through so much-I love them all-

LABELS: CANCER WALKS, FAMILY 

TEAM MONYA

 

EMBER 20, 2010

TEAM MONYA

In April of 2011, Relay for Life will be in Gilbert again. 

My daughter Kayla set up a TEAM MONYA. If you want to be on our team, let her know. If any of you are in a financial situation where you can donate, I think they take any denomination of money, so please help if you can. All the money goes to the American Cancer Society. Click here for more information. Thank you so much; you are all so wonderful.

POSTED BY bonbon AT 11:23 AM 

Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom)

Warriors

THURSDAY, DECEMBER 2, 2010

Warriors

Who are the warriors in your life?   What is a warrior?    Webster has this to say about warriors...

WAR·RIOR

  noun, often attributive 
\ˈwȯr-yər, ˈwȯr-ē-ər, ˈwär-ē- also ˈwär-yər\

DEFINITION OF WARRIOR

: a man engaged or experienced in warfare; broadly: a person engaged in some struggle or conflict

I have been thinking about the word WARRIOR for a few weeks now. Athletes are sometimes referred to as warriors when they put everything on the line to win, sometimes at any cost. The media has made some celebrities out to be WARRIORS, people in our lives who we can look up to or admire for their fight to get where they are today. Going to battle is what you may think of a WARRIOR standing up for what they believe. 

This is what I have decided; it's not about how much money you make or have; it's not about who you know or where you live. It's all about how much love you have in your heart; it matters. The person who struggles every day to make enough money to feed their family is a WARRIOR. The people who share what they have with the less fortunate are WARRIORS. The single mothers striving to raise beautiful, compassionate children, you are  WARRIORS. No matter what type of day they have had, the father and mother bring their family together every night and kneel for family prayer are WARRIORS. 

 Most WARRIORS don't know they are; they make life easier for those around them without effort. I've seen people in a different light; most people are good and want to share, and most of us want to become WARRIORS. I love Webster's 2nd example of a WARRIOR  "a person engaged in some struggle or conflict"  do you know anyone in your life without struggle or conflict? I don't; WE ARE ALL WARRIORS in our own right.

LABELS: CANCER, JOURNALING, RANDOM 

Breast Self Exams (BSE)

 

Breast Self Exam (BSE)

step 1


step 2

step 3

step 4

step 5

step 6

Today is November 1st, on the 1st day of every month I remind women to do their BSE Breast Self Exam. All women over the age of 20 should be examining their breasts for lumps every month. I truly believe that early detection is crucial and truly does save lives. I wish I had been more proactive and done this every month. Every woman including me always thinks "that won't happen to me, or I don't have time" I said those things, I always thought that breast cancer was something that unhealthy, OLD people got diagnosed with. I was just about as healthy as a woman my age could be when I was diagnosed I was training for a marathon, all my life have been a runner and a gym member spending at least 2 hours a day at the gym 6 days a week for about 13 years that was my life, and it was never a chore it was something I truly loved. The diagnosis came as a complete surprise to not only me but anyone who knows me, I am HEALTHY and I am not OLD. Please if you are reading this blog promise me you will take your BSE every month and avoid the terror of hearing "you have breast cancer"

If you need to know how to do your BSE please copy this for your records. The pictures are numbered to go along with each step. I could not get them to enter next to each step sorry.

Breast self-examination (BSE) is to be performed each month in addition to an annual mammogram or a clinical exam. Knowing your cyclical changes, what is normal for you, and what regular monthly changes in the breast feel like is the best way to keep an eye on your breast health. Breast tissue extends from under your nipple and areola up toward your armpit.
Difficulty: Easy

Time Required: 15 minutes a month

What You Need:

A mirror that lets you see both breasts
A pillow for your head and shoulders
Privacy

1. Make a regular date for your BSE --- I always do it on the 1st of every month

If you are pre-menopausal: Set a regular time to examine your breasts a few days after your period ends, when hormone levels are relatively stable and breasts are less tender.
If you are already menopausal (have not had a period for a year or more): Pick a particular day of the month to do the exam, and then repeat your BSE on that day each month.

2. Visual Exam - Hands-on Hips

In the privacy of your bathroom, strip to the waist and stand before a mirror. You will need to see both breasts at the same time. Stand with your hands on your hips and check the appearance of your breasts. Look at size, shape, and contour. Note changes, if any, in the skin color or texture. Look at the nipples and areolas, to see how healthy they look.

3. Visual Exam - Arms Over Your Head

Still standing in front of the mirror, raise your arms over your head and see if your breasts move in the same way, and note any differences. Look at size, shape, and drape, checking for symmetry. Pay attention to your nipples and areolas, to see if you have any dimples, bumps, or retraction (indentation). Look up toward your armpits and note if there is any swelling where your lymph nodes are (lower armpit area).

4. Manual Exam - Stand and Stroke

Raise your left arm overhead, and use your right-hand fingers to apply gentle pressure to the left breast. Stroke from the top to the bottom of the breast, moving across from the inside of the breast all the way into your armpit area. You can also use a circular motion, being sure to cover the entire breast area. Take note of any changes in texture, color, or size. Switch sides and repeat. This is best done in the shower, as wet skin will have the least resistance to the friction of your fingers.

5. Manual Exam - Check Your Nipples

Still facing the mirror, lower both arms. With your right hand's index and middle fingers, gently squeeze the left nipple and pull forward. Does the nipple spring back into place? Does it pull back into the breast? Note whether or not any fluid leaks out. Reverse your hands and check the right nipple in the same way.
6. Manual Exam - Recline and Stroke


This is best done in your bedroom, where you can lie down. Place a pillow on the bed so that you can lie with both your head and shoulders on the pillow. Lie down and put your left hand behind your head. Use your right hand to stroke the breast and underarm, as you did in step 4. Take note of any changes in texture, color, or size. Switch sides and repeat.

7. Tips For Doing Your BSE
Mark, your calendar to remind yourself to do your BSE regularly. This is a good way to prevent worry if find a normal cyclic change.
Stay relaxed and breathe normally as you do your BSE. Becoming tense will produce some knots that you may mistake for something worrisome.
Report any changes or unusual pain to your doctor or nurse practitioner. Keep a log of changes, if that helps you remember.
Remember to have an annual clinical exam and a mammogram.

Dear Cancer

 

THURSDAY, OCTOBER 14, 2010

Dear Cancer

I am on my way to the MAYO Hospital...I want to leave you with this challenge...write a letter to CANCER, really tell him what you think, everyone knows someone who has been affected, CANCER kills and hurts families. For every letter written and POSTED $50 will be donated to the American Cancer Society up to a maximum of $100,000.

Click here to get started

POSTED BY BonBon AT 11:45 AM 2 COMMENTS 

Warm Fuzzies

 

SUNDAY, OCTOBER 10, 2010

More Warm Fuzzies

Another "warm fuzzy" thank you to whoever dropped this off; I have been wearing it every day.

Another "warm fuzzy" landed on my front doorstep yesterday. THANK YOU ♥ THANK YOU. I wish I could give you a big hug. The flowers made my day, night, and the next day.

POSTED BY BonBon AT 10:44 PM 0 COMMENTS 

Hip Pain

 

TUESDAY, SEPTEMBER 14, 2010

Hip Pain

This week my hips are really in pain. It hurts to walk up and down the stairs at my house. I don't like taking the pain medicine because it makes me feel like I am giving in to it.
Also, this week I have been receiving emails from the American Cancer Society, the last email that came asked me if I was ready to purchase a wig or look at their catalog for hats and beanies..... WHAT? Been there, done that, there should be some kind of filter that lets A.C.S know we are done with chemo and moving on with our lives. I have had a bit of a bad attitude this past week, can you tell? I really don't mind getting the emails. Still, when I opened the TLC catalog, it brought back a wave of emotions and memories, Tamy and I looked at that catalog a year ago, and I considered purchasing some hats from them but decided against it. Then when I did decide to buy one, I got a prescription from my oncologist and bought one at a store close to Mayo Clinic. I never wore it, never, not even once. I think my kids and all their friends have more fun wearing that wig; even Recker wore it one day.

POSTED BY UNKNOWN AT 8:26 PM 0 COMMENTS 

Mother's Day Weekend in Utah

 

MONDAY, MAY 10, 2010

Mother's Day Weekend In Utah

WOW, it's been a while since I've blogged, and our internet has not allowed me to. So here is the update: Eric, Haleigh, and I left on Friday after my radiation appointment to visit Kaitlyn and Brian in Utah. Their house is so cute and totally reflects her personality. On Saturday morning, we went to the Gateway Mall in Salt Lake City, where a VILLAIN walk started and ended.

 The entire Wright family, including spouses, walked, except one of Brian's sisters, Tori. Jamie Patterson, Kelsie Webster, Emily Brinton, and Willi Nixon all walked with us. Over 20,000 people were walking/running. I am not quite up to running yet, but I was proud of myself for being able to walk the entire 5k. 

It was an overwhelming sight to see the road and witness a sea of white and pink VILLAIN shirts. I loved catching up with all of the girls' friends, you know, getting the scoop on who's dating who and all, they are all so cute, and I love them for supporting such a great cause. I also enjoyed talking with Brian's family; they are such a great family, always supportive and kind. 

When all the survivors (wearing PINK) paraded together, they stood on the steps for a tribute and picture. It was amazing to look around and see pink shirts surrounding me, knowing each of these women has a story; they each are part of this world I live in. They understand, and the tears are genuine as they run down our cheeks.

I was searching the crowd for Eric. Our eyes connected. The world that he lives in as a caregiver is a different world than even I understand. Our friends surrounding him could understand his tears. I looked out in the crowd; many were crying. They were shedding tears for someone they know who has survived or lost their lives to the VILLAIN but also for themselves. 

Caregivers desperately stand by watching their loved ones go through the pain they cannot fix. It hit me that Eric is a fixer, and he wants me to be happy and always has tried to protect me and fix what is wrong .... this VILLAIN he could not fix, how hard that must be on him.

We had a great couple of days with Kaitlyn, Brian, and his family. We got on a flight early Sunday morning to talk to Blake on Mother's Day. It was nice to hear his voice and know he is doing well and enjoying his mission. I think he was happy to talk to us too. The language is really coming along for him, and he likes his companion a lot. I told him not to worry about me; I am doing so good, and the Lord is blessing us because of his service. This was such a good weekend for me. Thank you to all my children who make me want to be a better person, who constantly surprise me with their strength and unconditional love. I Love You!!!!

B-is for Brady B-Strong

 

TUESDAY, MAY 4, 2010

B-is for Brady B-Strong

One of the positive things that have come out of my diagnosis with the VILLAIN is the opportunity to meet some of the strongest, bravest people I know. Whenever I go to the Mayo Clinic, the grocery store, or the mall, I am blessed to meet people who will forever stay in my prayers and heart. Last week, at a pizza shop in Tempe, Eric and I met a man who I have been thinking about every day since. He noticed that we had a relay for life sticker in our car and that I was bald. He approached Eric and asked about my VILLAIN. As he and Eric talked, I was in the distance and could tell they were talking about me. The man introduced himself and immediately started to cry, I hugged him, and he told me about his 2-year-old son.

Brady was diagnosed with a rare VILLAIN at age 3 months. He told me that Brady is the youngest to ever be diagnosed. He told of the struggle it has been as a parent to watch his child go through the agony he has endured over the past 2 years. Brady has been put under over 80 times in his short life. He has a breathing tube through his nose, he does not know what it is like to run outside and play, and he will never be able to do the normal things in life that we all take for granted. My heart ached for this man. Both Eric and I got emotional and cried as he spoke. It's much easier to handle when adults are diagnosed; a young child does not understand what is happening to them. This is the only life Brady knows. The man took a bracelet off his arm and gave it to me; it said B-is for Brady B-Strong!!

This week, thinking about Brady made me think about the Savior and the agony and suffering he went through in the Garden of Gethsemane. His Father had to watch HIS son go through the worse pain any person has ever had to endure, and Heavenly Father could have taken it all away and stopped it at any time, but he didn't because it was all part of the plan. I'm sure that our Heavenly Father suffered along with HIS son, knowing the pain he was going through.
As we go through our trials, I'm sure Heavenly Father looks down on us all and wants to take away the pain, he feels our anguish and has the power to take it all away, but he doesn't because this too is part of his plan. Our trials are all part of HIS plan, how we endure and who we become through our trials.

Relay For Life 2010

 

SATURDAY, APRIL 17, 2010

Relay For Life 2010

My sister Sonya organized TEAM MONYA. This is the 1st year I have ever participated in this event. All of my children have been apart of Relay for years but I never really knew what it was about until tonight. It was an emotional night for me and so many survivors of the VILLAIN. 

The night began with all the survivors making the 1st lap around the track, I walked with Dena Weech, a friend of mine from my ward she is a survivor of non-hotchkins lymphoma for 5 years now. As Dena and I walked, we talked about this VILLAIN that both of us know all too well. I told her that I am realizing that VILLAIN victims are in a society of their own, no-one can understand that society unless they are a victim of it. Breast cancer patients are also in a world of their own, I feel their pain and know the anxiety of losing breasts to the VILLAIN. 

I also know that the way I feel right now, if I were to be told the VILLAIN is taking over other areas of my body I would not do this fight again, yes you heard it right, I would give up. I can't do chemo again. Eric made a good point to me when he said "I know you, you would fight again, it's like having a baby, no one ever thinks about having another baby right after they have one" I agree, right now it's all too fresh, I remember the pain and the sickness and since I am still in treatment I guess I should not be too eager to say what I would do.

Last night I met so many survivors who have fought and won their battles, they have been free of the VILLAIN for years and years. Going through this it's easy to get discouraged when you hear about the ones who fought and lost their battle. 

I think the stories that touched me the hardest were the children who have become victim to this awful disease. Knowing what I know about the VILLAIN I don't ever want my children to experience this like I have. To see such young children was heart wrenching, as a mother it would be so difficult to watch your child suffer. I wonder how Heavenly Father could watch his son suffer in the garden for all of our sins.  He must have wanted to take away the Savior's pain.

It makes me think ..... besides all my fellow breast cancer patients, Jesus is the only other who understands, truly understands our pain. He felt the pain of neuropathy, the sickness of chemo and the fatigue of radiation. This is comforting, I can't explain it but I am overwhelmed knowing that when I pray for peace and for the hope He gets it, He knows me and what I am feeling when I can't explain my fears to anyone He understands. I know Heavenly Father would love to take away my pain. He can't this is my journey, and I have learned so much about myself, our family has had so many blessings come because of and in spite of the VILLAIN.