My Visit with Dr. Northfelt

 

SUNDAY, MAY 26, 2013

My visit with Dr. Northfelt

This past week my husband turned 55 years old--we decided to go to Paris for the week. We always have an enjoyable time together, but I don't think we will go back in May again. It was rainy and cold. We went to my "happy place" to ride bikes, and it was pouring down. No bicycles and it is freezing. We walked around, drank some hot chocolate, and talked about having my ashes spread there in that beautiful place--they painted the house/chateau a red and white color. I liked it better when it was just white--Eric spoke to the guard at the gate, and he said for a fee, we can rent out an area or room for family--could it be that he is finally warming up to the idea of my cremation?

Porte Jaune my "happy place"

the walkways and bike trails in Porte Jaune

This is the cute little hot cocoa/sandwich shop we love

At the river, usually, there are giant white swans

the private chateaux

Paris is and always will be "our place" I love spending time with Eric in Paris, and it never gets old. We have our favorite places we like to go to, but mostly just spending the days alone together holding hands and walking through the beautiful parks and streets is the best.

Frenchie

Notre Dame picture for Dr. Northfelt

These are what I save up all my sugar for--days to look
forward to--pastries are my favorite sweets, and I will
wait a year. If I know, I can have them.

I'm not always forthcoming regarding my visits at Mayo Clinic, especially with my family. I just don't want them to worry--if there is a concern, I will tell them, but to go for regular appointments with my doctors and for tests and more tests, I usually just don't give any reports. I saw Dr. Northfelt just before we left for Paris (he is my medical oncologist). We visited for a while; lots of questions, few answers. No, I am not cancer free. He asked if I wanted to change the cancer medicine I take every day and see if I would get fewer side effects. My question was, "what does it do?" his answer was, "blocks estrogen," then I replied, "What does the medicine I'm taking now do" His answer was, "Blocks estrogen." we both looked at each other and laughed, he shrugged his shoulders. All he could say was, "1/2 of my patients do really well, the other half don't, but they all have side effects" I then smiled and said, "well, OK then, let's try it," until I went to get the prescription filled and found out it costs $299.00 pp, and that was with my insurance, I decided to stick with the original medicine and live with the side effects if I was 100% sure there would be a change for the good I would pay it. Still, I'm not willing to take the chance of even more side effects and a massive possibility of no changes. I emailed Dr. Northfelt from Paris and told him, and he replied back that my decision was reasonable and to please send him a picture.

I am coming up on my 4th anniversary of being diagnosed with breast cancer. I'm grateful to still be alive and know I still have a long road ahead of me but don't we all? Life is Good for me right now.

Gettin' Old Eric Turns 55

THURSDAY, MAY 16, 2013

Gettin' Old Eric Turns 55

I have no regrets marrying this guy. However, he gets relentlessly teased by our Family for a few things. He cannot tell a story--my mind gets terribly scrambled when he starts to tell one of "his" stories. The story usually begins in the middle, with a few of "then he .... and it went over there...." by the time he is done with the story, none of us have any idea what was just said. Another annoying thing he gets constantly teased about is how he eats his popcorn at a movie theatre, NO ONE wants to sit next to him, he's loud and shovels it in his mouth like it's his last meal--I can live with this, no problem--over the 30+ years I've known this guy I have not met anyone who does not love him, have never heard a curse word come out of his mouth, and he does not gossip but finds the good in people--thank you to his parents Viola and Ray Williams for instilling those qualities in him.

When I first met Eric, it was not love at first sight. We met at an ASU single dance. Brent Stapley (who I really liked) introduced us, we danced, Brent went off to BYU and married the love of his life Julie then Eric and I continued to date and eventually marry. The night I came home from our 1st official date, my mom asked me, "so, what did you think of this guy?"  I said, "he's OK; I really like his family, though"

As time passed and we dated regularly, I began seeing what everyone else saw. This great man wanted nothing more than to please his parents and Family. He had a great love for his mother and father. Over the next 3 years, as we dated, his mother became the most significant influence in my life. Year after year, when we did not get engaged on birthdays or holidays, I began to question whether this was right for me. I will never forget a Christmas when Vi (erics mom) set me down and told me how much she loved me and that she could see the sadness I was feeling but told me not to give up on Eric. I was given a blessing, and I knew this was what I should do, but still, it was frustrating. We got engaged that year on Christmas day. The date was set for April 28.  Vi went into the hospital in February and passed away 10 days later. One day while visiting her, she was asleep and sat straight up, stared me in the eye, and said, "no matter what happens to me, promise me you and Eric will get married."

We did, and we have experienced a lot of trials and hardships through the years, but with all of it, we have truly become best friends. He was deeply compassionate when I was diagnosed with cancer and has continued to be my biggest fan and cheerleader during this fight.

I love you, Eric, and I hope you love your Birthday--Paris, here we come.

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Paris 2011-European Smile Experiment-My Happy Place

 

SATURDAY, AUGUST 13, 2011

Paris 2011-European Smile Experiment- My Happy Place

It's hard to believe a year has passed since Eric and I took our fairytale trip to Paris--Now, here we are back again. We loved it, stayed at a lovely hotel--it was all part of the Euro-Pass package--Euro Pass not so great--Hotels-- 5 stars plus and beautiful--and free

Frenchie is back

The Park, the panini, the fountains

Bikes, Crepes, the beautiful buildings

The gargoyles, Frenchie, My favorite birdman

Eiffel Tower, Seine River, Pigeon Lady

Pastries, Parks, and Castles

Self Portraits-waiting for our bikes

Bike Rides in My Happy Place

We loved this tree

Last day in Paris, at the hotel, the man selling Sorbet out of his truck.

Fontainbleau France

The Castle--European Smile Experiment

Michael Jackson danced in the streets.

Our last meal in Paris -- Frenchie eats Mussels-Steak & Potatoes-Chocolate Mousse.
Monya-French Onion Soup-Spaghetti -Flan with Caramel Sauce

The Macaroons-Buildings-Doors, and Graffiti 

Our time in Paris was magical. One day I told Eric I wanted to try an experiment -- I told him to smile at every single person he saw and see what happens--he then told me that in Paris, you need to say Bon Jour first, then the smile. I said, "Nope, this is my experiment. No talk, just a smile."  I did it my way, and he did it his way--Eric was correct, every person he said Bon Jour and smiled at, gave the same respect back to him--me not so good, I noticed eye contact was problematic, I struggled to get smiles in because they were so busy walking and looking at the ground rather than looking at who was walking towards them. The picture above with Eric and the lady on the bus makes me laugh. I smiled over and over at her. Not only did she not smile, she frowned at me, but good ole Frenchie says Bon Jour and smiles, and she is his best friend. 

One little girl looked at me, and I smiled--she immediately looked at me with a weird half smile,  half "whatever" look, and turned away--the only people who gave me any attention were Americans -- I am in no way saying that Americans are better or that they communicate better, it is just a difference in cultural backgrounds. I actually found the Parisians to be extremely helpful and polite; I think we live in a world where we all need to be more accepting of each other. I remember doing this same experiment last year when I was going through cancer treatments and had to be at Mayo for a day--for the most part, every person gave me a smile and at least a nod of the head in acknowledgment.

The day we took the bus out to my "happy place" to ride bikes was my favorite day ever--last year, we did the same thing, and I took that memory with me every time I had surgery or had to face an anxiety attack coming on--I feel at  HOME in that place--it was beautiful nothing had changed--my thoughts as I rode my bike through the beautiful tree-lined paths was that this is peaceful, no outside world to influence me, no noise but the birds and wind blowing in my face. I saw no cell phones, computers, or distractions--I was deep in thought. As Frenchie and I sat on a rock talking next to the lake, I told him, "please don't spend money on an expensive casket for me when I die, just cremate my body and put me in a Dixie cup, bring me here, and spread my ashes."  He laughed, but I was serious. I love that place. This is where I am entirely free from all life's worries; here, there is no VILLAIN, no one to disappoint me or hurt me; everywhere I look, there are people holding hands, kissing, hugging, laughing--simply put, they are enjoying LIFE. On my shirt that day were the words C'est Bon -- Frenchie said it means "It's All Good,"  perfect words for the day I had -- Life is Good --

Thankful

 

November 9, 2010

Thankful

In this month of Thanksgiving, I am thankful for these random things that come into my head ... haha

●cooler weather●green grass●blue skies●
●hugs from recker● emails from the DominicanReoublic●people who smile●
●mysti●clean fresh sheets●cute boots●open roads from Utah to arizona●
●december 18th●haleigh●my body●hair●cute notes left on my bedroom door●
●grapefruit●AJ'S refillable cup●choices●good VT'S●LOVE●
●Dr Kreymerman●Heather Lucas his assistant●
●medicne that works●pumpkin pie●ERIC●doorbell ditchers who leave yummy stuff●testimony●kayla and Jeremy●music●
●people that inspire me●Blake●good books●google searches● cinnamon smells●answered prayers●warm fuzzier●Kaitlyn and Brian●Haleigh
●laughter●mayo clinic●tamy scheurn●mickey mouse●organic apple slices●going the extra mile●christmas movies●THANKSGIVING●

try to think in 2 minutes or less of all the things you are thankful for.....I'm sure I forgot a few, and some of these are random huh?

Back to Reality

 

THURSDAY, AUGUST 26, 2010

Back to Reality

WOW, how do people recover from such romantic, exotic vacations? The flight home was bittersweet; I loved the time that Frenchie and I spent together in France. It was like a dream that I didn't want to wake up from, not just because it was a lifelong dream of mine to go to Paris with Frenchie and that he planned all of it on his own .... who does that? But also because life in Gilbert is not living in Paris. I didn't think of the VILLAIN or its side effects. I didn't constantly have to think of what I was eating and if I was feeding the VILLAIN with sugar, flour, or anything that touched my lips. It was so lovely for 10 days to fully enjoy, let myself be free, and re-kindle those feelings of young love and the romantic notions of life in a different place, with no worries.

Just as our plane was descending into Phoenix, I looked out the window and heard the pilot say, "Welcome to Phoenix" tears ran down my face; I could not control my emotions. How do I return from such a Heavenly experience to "my life, for real?" Suddenly the thoughts of Mayo Clinic, Doctor's appointments, and medications flooded my brain.

Now that I have had a few days home, I realize just what my husband gave me was an amazing opportunity. It was a blessing for me to let go, and I had forgotten what it was like to be carefree and completely 100% in the moment.
We all have to face hard times in our lives, but it's pleasant to check out once in a while. 

POSTED BY BonBon AT 1:50 PM 4 COMMENTS 

Last Day In Paris

 

MONDAY, AUGUST 23, 2010

Last Day in Paris

I am sitting in the Hotel for the last night in Paris, happy, oh so glad that I have been living in this dream fantasy world of mine for 9 days, but now it's time to go back to reality. Tomorrow is the day we will do that, but before we do, I just wanted to say ...

This is the man who can frustrate me more than anyone else can, the man who can make me laugh more than anyone else can, the one who puts up with me and my imperfections. He is the man who has stood by me through the years; this is the man I choose to be with for Eternity... I love You, Frenchie !!!

If I stood in the city of Paris, what would I see? Well, at any given corner, in Paris, these are a few things I saw today...tons of places to shop, fashion is everywhere you look.



People drinking COKE, someone drinking a BEER, and lovers holding hands.




Double-Decker busses


Museums or Castles


Police cars and their cute European sirens going off.


Frenchie was so excited when it rained today; he had to have a picture with the umbrellas open and jackets on. Look at that smile!!



This is what Frenchie looked like ......


This is what he was trying to look like...... with the hat on backward.....note to Frenchie: You look much better.


Me and Frenchie, people, watching at Notre Dame


Salad, bruschetta, and Spaghetti for dinner.




Incredible Chocolate Mousse for dessert.

After eating, Frenchie did not want to ask for the check yet. Before we went to dinner, he told me that the European culture makes their dinners last 2 hours (at least). This is true; Frenchie and I went to dinner one night and sat next to this couple; we finished, went shopping, and walked back by an hour or so later, and there they were, sitting and drinking a cup of coffee or wine,, whatever it was.....seriously? So tonight, I told Frenchie I would sit and take pictures of him until he got the check... it didn't take too long after that. I said, " why not walk, talk and eat simultaneously?" Americans are much better at multi-tasking




Maybe he should lick his bowl; that could take up some time.
Or, I could lick my bowl.
.

Dinner should not last 2 hours, do ya think? I can sit here all night taking pictures of Frenchie.




Frenchie and I at dinner on our last night in Paris


Frenchie sportin' the Sperry's ..... me well, I'm just glad I don't have blisters after this week of walkin'.


I told Frenchie a few days ago I wanted to take some pictures of people's shoes.... he looked at me like I was from another Planet..he said I am a creeper, stalker kinda girl. I told him I can tell a lot about a person by looking at their shoes...








The lady in the blue pumps made me follow her into a creperie (who knows how many blocks) just so I could get a picture of her shoes, well, actually, she has no idea I took the picture... I wonder why Frenchie thinks I'm a stalker?



Frenchie and the French Maid.


I don't know what these are called, but they are really cool; 2 wheels in the front and one in the back.


Some window displays I liked.




POSTED BY BonBon AT 11:04 AM 5 COMMENTS