Marathon Dreams

 

TUESDAY, FEBRUARY 2, 2010

Marathon Dreams

I thought as I watched Brothers and Sisters with my daughter the other day, I wish my life was like this TV show. One of the girls on the show found out 2 months ago she has cancer; she has already gone through chemo, lost all her hair, radiation, and is now running for a Senate spot; oh yeah, and her hair is back ............. wait what??????? I wish it was that easy and fast !!!! Actually, I take that back. I am glad my life is genuine. I have to feel something, learn something, and HOLLYWOOD is not where I want to learn it.

The last 2 nights, I woke up from dreams of me running. It felt so good. I know to some that would be a nightmare, haha. I am so determined to fight this VILLAIN and be able to exercise again. I was not in a race; I was just running in a park, happy with all my hair in a ponytail. I was keeping up the pace and enjoying the scenery around me. The trees were beautifully green, and along the path were flowers. I could see some weeds ahead of me, like tumbleweeds, and I remember wondering how I would get around them because they were utterly covering my path. I tried to run straight through them, but they were so thick, and the thorns were cutting my legs up. The next thing I knew, the tumbleweeds were starting to disappear, and the path was clear again. I continued to run, back on pace. The sky was as blue and as remarkable as I had ever seen before. Up ahead was the giant mountain, and again, I wondered if I could make it without being pushed from behind. As I started to conquer the hill, tears began to run down my face. I could feel the pain and wanted to give up, my legs were burning, and my mind started to say, "you can't do this" just when I thought I couldn't do it, I woke up. I was so mad. I tried to go back to sleep but could not get the dream back.

Until last night,,,,, I was at the top of that mountain looking down, knowing and appreciating where I had been but looking ahead, knowing the road was still long and hard, but I continued to run. I remember stepping up my pace and smiling at the road ahead of me. I couldn't see the finish line but knew if I continued at the rate I was at, I would finish; I said to myself, "it's not how you start the race, it's how you finish it" this is the famous saying I give to all my kids when they are facing something hard in their life.

Tonight as I ponder this dream, it means so much to me. I know I am not at the top of the mountain yet; I am still fighting the VILLAIN. I'm running "my marathon" there have been tumbleweeds along the way, and I've kicked them to the curb with the help of prayers and fasting from so many people. I am on the uphill with the Lord picking me up and carrying me on those days when I think I cannot finish. When I finish this race, my family will be at the finish line cheering me on, along with so many good friends, old and new.