Anthony Gruninger :)

 

Dear Frenchie,

Today was exhausting. In fact, attending four funerals this week has been mentally and emotionally draining. But today was also so very special.

Anthony’s funeral began at ten this morning. I was incredibly proud of his nephew, Mele, and Bo Bigelow as they spoke so eloquently about Tony. Clyde Bawden played a beautiful medley on the piano, and, of course, everyone wore leis around their necks. Karen was so thoughtful to have them available for family and close friends.

It was an honor to be there—to cry tears of both joy and sorrow as we collectively gave our hearts and love to Anthony.

Anthony wanted to be cremated, so Bunker loaned Wayne and Karen a casket for the funeral service. I had never seen that done before, and I was grateful they could honor Anthony’s wishes while still giving everyone the opportunity to gather and say goodbye.

After the service, everyone was invited to the Val Vista Lakes Clubhouse for a Luau—and boy, was it a fun one. Garrett served as the master of ceremonies and did a wonderful job. There was Hawaiian food, music, and entertainment. You would have loved every minute of it, so would your sweet mom. I hope you were watching as we celebrated Tony’s life.

I loved seeing Polynesian culture represented so beautifully in his honor. My favorite moment was when Karen danced for her son. She performed a graceful Hawaiian dance and dedicated it to Tony. I’m not sure I could have done what she did. As she moved, I could feel her spirit shining through every step. When she finished, she received a standing ovation—and she deserved every second of it.

Garrett opened the microphone for anyone who wanted to share a memory of Anthony. When no one volunteered at first, they began calling on people.

You know I have so many memories of Tony, just as you did, but none of us have the memories that he and Haleigh shared. Besides, I felt that many of the stories I could tell probably weren’t appropriate for the microphone. LOL.

I stayed quiet because I am still so fragile after losing you—and now losing Anthony in Hawaii too. But one of my favorite memories came flooding back to me.

You and I were in Mexico with Anthony and Haleigh, and we attended church on Fast Sunday. I think they were only twelve years old. Together, those two best friends stood up and bore their testimonies of the Gospel of Jesus Christ.

I don’t remember exactly what they said. I only remember how deeply moved I was that they made the decision together and were brave enough to stand up. They didn’t know the language, but that is the beautiful thing about the Spirit. It isn’t always about the words someone speaks. Sometimes, it is simply about how those words leave you feeling.

I was so proud of them.

Oh, Eric, we have such beautiful, kind, and compassionate children. I like to believe they received some of that from both of us.

I know you would have loved the entire celebration. You would have been searching the room for people to talk to, making sure everyone felt welcome and thanking them for coming. I tried to do that too. You know I am trying to become a little more like you were—social, welcoming, and kind—without losing my humor or my genuine compassion for people.

When the mariachis arrived, I sat and cried because I knew you would have grabbed either Karen or me and insisted that we dance with you.

I miss you.

Nearly everyone who knew us expressed concern for me, knowing that Anthony had also died in Hawaii, just as you did. That connection made the day especially emotional.

Haleigh, our sweet, kind, and compassionate daughter, gave the closing remarks. She did a wonderful job describing her and Tony's friendship from the time they were only 10 years old. She thanked Karen and I for trusting them to be friends, and allowing sleep overs and many trips to Mexico. 

Anthony was kind, generous, and really lived his life to the fullest. He served others and loved to wheel and deal like you did. I am going to miss his laugh, his love, and most of all not being able to make new memories with him.

You know what? Because of the things that happened leading up to that day on the beach, I believe that somewhere in your spirit, you knew Heavenly Father was preparing you. Maybe you didn’t know it would be that particular day, but I believe you could feel that something was coming.

Thank you for talking with me that night and into the early morning about the things only you and I know. Those conversations have comforted, strengthened, and even sanctified me through some very difficult times.

I love you, Babe. Haleigh sent me these pictures! What a treasure I will frame them for our home.