Father's Day 2026

 

Dear Frenchie,

Well, hello again—and Happy Father’s Day to you.

Later today, I will drive out and place flowers at your gravesite. I’m not sure why I go there as often as I do. I think I find peace in knowing your body rests there, even though I understand that your spirit has moved on.

Eric, you were the best of the best fathers. I am so grateful I had the privilege of raising our children with you. They are good, happy, and genuinely kind people. Isn’t that what success really looks like?

Most of the time, you and I disagreed about the consequences they should face for misbehaving. You wanted them to pull weeds in the backyard or clean out a room or closet that you probably needed to clean yourself. The weed-pulling punishment was especially difficult for me because Gary used to make us do the same thing. It was a real trigger, and I hated that rule. I probably raised my voice more than I should have.

Actually, there is no “probably” about it. I did.

I wish we could take back some of those moments, but I also believe they helped me understand both of us a little better now that you are gone. I have never liked the saying, “We did the best we could,” but in many ways, it is true. We made mistakes—some we would give anything to undo—but we also apologized, learned, and tried to do better.

Parenting without you has been sad and difficult. Since moving, I don’t see or talk to the kids and grandchildren as often as I might have if I had stayed in our Gilbert home. I miss that part of my life so much.

At the same time, moving has forced me to create a life with some balance. I have made new friends and found walking buddies in the neighborhood, including people you once sold homes to. I even started a Bunco group in the ward, and there is always a waiting list. They love it—and so do I. I also join the widows in my ward on Thursday nights to play cards. They are a hoot; of course, I am the youngest amongst them, but man, do they love to share life experiences I love. laugh and learn from.

Learning who I am without always being known as “Eric’s wife” or “Kayla, Blake, Kaitlyn, and Haleigh’s mom” has helped me discover more of myself. Don’t get me wrong—I still treasure those titles. They are among the greatest honors of my life.

But as I continue moving forward, I am also Monya Williams.

I am a woman trying to become a better person. I am learning to laugh at myself, to worry less about my facial paralysis, and to live fully even without the smile I once had. I am releasing the shame I carried about my mothering. I am grateful that the Lord entrusted these four amazing children to our family.

I will no longer allow thoughts of failure and unworthiness to take up space in my mind, and I will never place those thoughts upon our children. They are adults now, making their own choices and living their own lives. I love them exactly as they are.

You would too.

Happy Father’s Day, Babe.

I love you so much.